Unacceptable Behavior

By Braelin A

Sex is a gross, icky thing that you're only supposed to do with a person you deeply love. Sex is an intense, intimate experience; as long as it's the right kind, at the right time, in the right position, with one member of the opposite sex.

We've been told lies about sex and intimacy for our entire lives; we've learned to live with the oxymoronic nature of the publics infatuation and simultaneous disgust with human sexuality. Join me and discuss the reality of sex, intimacy, gender, education, fear, love, and everything in between. Welcome to Unacceptable Behavior.

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6 Months Pregnant and BACK on Stage??

Unacceptable BehaviorMar 01, 2022

00:00

31:57

6 Months Pregnant and BACK on Stage??

Casual podcast discussing ADHD, cannabis, performing while pregnant, and performative activism onstage.

Follow Braelin: instagram.com/braelinand

Follow Unacceptable Behavior: instagram.com/unacceptablebehaviorpodcast

Mar 01, 202231:57

Pizza and Polyamory #3 - Who's the Father?

Today, for the first time, the three of us sit down and talk through the dirty details of our situation, family dynamics, learning how to live with each other, discussions on being future parents, and least importantly... who is the father?

(But most importantly... Why do you ask?)

While we do disclose our decision as to who the biological father of our child would be, the more important question to us is: why are people so curious? If both men are portraying the role of father, then what is your curiosity behind the question "who's the biological dad?"

Is it because you want to know what our daughter is going to call them? (dad)

Is it because you have concerns about the health risk associated with either of their family histories? (you do not need to know the health status of our daughter unless is directly affects you)

Is it because you feel like you deserve to know who came in me? (I have a feeling it's this one.)

Honestly, I continue to wonder this every time that question is presented to us (which is far more often than appropriate, might I add). Mostly, I think it's important that folks deeply consider my counter question before you listen to this episode to feed your morbid curiosity: WHY DO YOU ASK?

I humbly ask that you ponder my question as you sit back and listen in on our first full-family discussion on Pizza and Polyamory #4 - Who's the Father?

Follow me on instagram:

instagram.com/braelinand

instagram.com/unacceptablebehaviorpodcast

Feb 12, 202201:23:10

How I Got Pregnant Right Away (and why I HATE it)

According to Cleveland Clinic, hyperemesis gravidarum is "an uncommon disorder in which extreme, persistent nausea and vomiting occur during your pregnancy." I'm at 21 weeks and reflecting on my pregnancy journey thus far -- while HG has been a massive part of my story, there's a lot more that I get the opportunity to share. It's difficult going through a life changing event like pregnancy without your moms support -- and those difficulties were exacerbated by non-inclusive clinical staff, constant struggles with the thought of termination amidst life-altering pain, and crippling fear of passing on generational curses and traumas. Ultimately, as I learned on the shores of lake Erie during a beautiful acid trip with my best friend: all that matters in the end is love and stories.
HER foundation for HG support: www.hyperemesis.org/
Braelin's insta: www.instagram.com/braelinand
Podcast insta: www.instagram.com/unacceptablebehaviorpodcast

Feb 04, 202201:01:17

Pizza and Polyamory #2: Braelin and Robert's Story

Join me and my partner(s) every other week for a special spinoff of Unacceptable Behavior, dedicated to discussing our relationship dynamic. Patrick, Robert, and Braelin are a family... But what does that mean, exactly? Are we a throuple? A triad? Polyamorous? Polyandrous? Is marriage on the table? Family and kids? Is everyone in our situation happy?
Today, Robert and I review the nuances of our 10 year "friendship", or whatever you'd call it.
Follow me on instagram:

instagram.com/braelinand
instagram.com/unacceptablebehaviorpodcast

Jan 28, 202201:40:24

RANT: 10 Things Not to Say to Someone with Hyperemesis Gravidarum

According to Cleveland Clinic, hyperemesis gravidarum is "an uncommon disorder in which extreme, persistent nausea and vomiting occur during your pregnancy."

At 19 weeks, I am still in the heat of suffering from this condition. This episode I lose my filter a little bit -- so I publish this at the risk of me sounding ungrateful. I am so grateful for my support systems. This is meant to be a ranty tangent on pet peeves I've encountered in my HG journey thus far. **IT IS DIRECTED AT NO ONE IN PARTICULAR AND SHOULD JUST BE TAKEN AS GENERALIZED RANTING ON HG. **

HER foundation for HG support: www.hyperemesis.org/

Braelin's insta: www.instagram.com/braelinand

Podcast insta: www.instagram.com/unacceptablebehaviorpodcast

Jan 22, 202247:52

Pizza and Polyamory #1: Patrick and Braelin Celebrate 8 Years

Join me and my partner(s) every other week for a special spinoff of Unacceptable Behavior, dedicated to discussing our relationship dynamic. Patrick, Robert, and Braelin are a family... But what does that mean, exactly? Are we a throuple? A triad? Polyamorous? Polyandrous? Is marriage on the table? Family and kids? Is everyone in our situation happy?
Join us for the most raw, open, and honest interview I've done so far as Patrick and I reflect on on 8 years of togetherness.
Follow me on instagram:

instagram.com/braelinand
instagram.com/unacceptablebehaviorpodcast

Jan 14, 202201:39:27

Deconstruction & Self Development with Accountability Coach Kristen Fechtel

Discussing deconstruction and the evangelical church with Kristen Fechtel, freelance accountability coach. We had an amazing conversation surrounding our similar upbringings. We share stories of growing up in the church, breaking free of evangelicalism, attending school for theatre, and continuing to hustle in the business and freelance world.
Kristen’s post on financial self-care: thehungryartists.com/blogs/the-hungry-artist-blog/financial-self-care
Follow Kristen: instagram.com/reallykristen_
Check out Kristen's work: thehungryartists.com
“If you are a person with lots of to-do lists, projects started, and big ideas but struggle with next steps or seeing a goal through, a coach will benefit you. As a coach, I can provide structured accountability and help guide you through the hard work. You will reach big goals by setting up systems that continue past our sessions. These will be the foundations for your future ventures, creative and otherwise! As someone who thrives in structure, but also loves working for myself, I provide that third party oversight to keep you on track with your deadlines and goals. I have a tough, no-nonsense style that is compatible with self motivated individuals.”
Follow me: instagram.com/braelinand
Follow the podcast: instagram.com/unacceptablebehaviorpodcast
Website: braelina.com

Jan 07, 202201:05:56

Performance Pleasure: Beyond Faking Orgasms

I found pleasure on a stage. The only gratification I had as a homeschooled diva was cast lists, solos, and performance opportunity. When I refer to the theatre industry, or theatrical folks, as “just masturbating in front of people on a stage”, that comes from a deeply personal place. Being raised as a child actor teaches you to express your vulnerability during your formative years in a way that other kids just aren’t asked to. In your most pleasurable moment, you are also your most vulnerable. It’s not unlike masturbating in front of a giant group of people. “Come watch me perform, watch me do what I love” we beckon. “We’ll change your world”. Whether the second part is true or not is highly debated. Actors love to say they’re changing the world, and even moreso, theatre teachers who target and manipulate children lead you to believe that the world will change as a result of your performance. Truly I believe this industry is evil — particularly for-profit theatre classes that fail to recognize diversity, equity and mental health precautions. It’s crucial that we call out problematic systems of oppression that cause pain and suffering of massive proportions, including but not limited to my own upbringing as a child actor fucking up me and my perception of the industry and the world. (In a way, I guess they did change my world.) I am now working actively to denounce toxic industry professionals and choose to commit my time only to those who are making strides towards racial equity and consent-based intimacy coordination. I actively seek to dismantle ableism, racism, and transphobia; and if you aren’t on that boat with me, then you are against me. Point, blank, period. Courtney Daniels Instagram (misspoke and called it twitter): https://www.instagram.com/randomblackgirllll/ My instagrams: https://www.instagram.com/braelinand && https://www.instagram.com/unacceptablebehaviorpodcast

Jun 16, 202129:24

I Was a Child Actor | An Ongoing Discussion on Consent, Safety, and Inequality in Performance Spaces

For 15 years, I went to a private, tuition based after school performance class. I grew up in this environment and it is single handedly responsible for shaping me into the person I am today; both the good, and the bad.
I could go on for hours about how growing up as a child actor shaped me; it shaped my professional attitude, my creativity, my collaboration skills and my ability to take direction and criticism. In those ways, theatre can offer structure and long term benefits that I cannot and would not ever deny, but those are not the focus of today.
Today we'll talk about the self hatred that is interwoven into generations of industry oppression and discrimination. I'll speak to the lifetime of rejections, and the social repercussions that has on me as an adult. We'll address the constant triggering of intense emotions during my formative years and the exploitation of that emotion and mold-ability. We will touch on the endless gaslighting and power manipulation of creative directors, the fear of judgement instilled in our hearts and minds, the child labor for the purpose of "entertainment", "educational opportunity", and "community service".
This is what happens to a child who was raised to believe that their worth was inherently tied to talent and castability.
This will be starting a new series of discussions on this podcast about theatre spaces, safety, mental health, consent, sexual repression, sex work, wealth inequality, and all the other behaviors associated with an industry/community that has gaslit itself into believing that it will change the world by playing pretend.
This is an open and ongoing discussion -- please reach out to me on instagram with questions, concerns, or if you have stories you'd like to share anything about your experience in live performance spaces.
Instagram: @BraelinAnd
#theatre #livetheater #performacespaces #safespaces #wealthinequality #sexeducation #childactors

Apr 19, 202157:10

How We Turned Women's Liberation Into Eugenicist Social Policy

Today we discuss the late 19th-early 20th century contraceptive movement, the founder of Planned Parenthood, and how they're intrinsically intertwined with eugenics, racist social policy, and the literal sterilization of black folks.
Killing the Black Body is a 1997 book authored by Dorothy Roberts. As the title and tagline suggests, it discusses race, reproduction, and the meaning of liberty in terms of how civil justice so closely intertwined with sexual education and reproductive justice. I'm a 26 year old, white, cisgendered polyamorous woman. I grew up strictly religious, and this greatly informs my lens as I move forward and discuss the second chapter in Roberts' book, The Dark Side of Birth Control.
I was shocked to read quotes from the founder of planned parenthood. I was appalled at the passing of legislation that legalized the sterilization of incarcerated folks. I was sick to my stomach as I realized just how closely reproductive justice was interlaced with eugenicist social policy.
I'm aware that my lens is that of a privileged white woman -- which is bound to make this brief chapter review less impactful than if you were to read the book directly. Though I cannot relate directly to these experiences, I feel moved to educate others on my process of both learning and un-learning.
Follow me on instagram @braelinand

Feb 16, 202155:05

Peformative Allies, White Saviors, and BIPOC in Media with Mx. Chelsey Morgan

I had the pleasure of getting to chat with Chelsey Morgan (@mxcmorgan) on today’s episode. We covered a lot of ground in this conversation, but there’s still work to be done!
I’m so grateful that Chelsey was willing to sit and share their experience with me, and I can honestly say I’m shocked by their experience as a queer, afro-latinx androgen person. The diversity of their many identities and the impact that it on their life is something I’m very grateful to get to help share; it's also something *I* cannot accurately put into words, so I encourage you to listen for yourself.
Some of the primary topics touched on are performative allyship (and whether or not it’s a good thing for the BIPOC community), white saviors in media, and the many struggles of adolescence (amplified). We also extensively discussed their history and touched on some personal family topics, including growing up in religion, going to 4 different High Schools, and never knowing which of their identities is going to hold them back or propel them forward on any given day.
I’m so pleased to get to grow as a sex educator alongside folks like Chelsey, and I really hope you’ll tune into our conversation and send them love and support!
Chelsey’s links:
@MXCMorgan on Instagram
mxcmorgan.com/
mxcm.art/

Feb 09, 202101:02:25

I Am An Ignorant, Racist White Woman

Today’s episode turn a major turnaround — initially, I had intended to do some recommendations and shoutouts of BIPOC people for Black History Month, and then I was going to move on and talk about something “closer to home”.

Yeah, you heard that right. In the middle of a civil rights movement, my dumb ass had initially decided that BLACK HISTORY was not “close enough to home”. I was not going to discuss issues of race — this is because I am an ignorant, racist cis gendered white woman, and for some reason, I believed this gave me a pass on discussing BIPOC issues in regards to sexuality.

It does not.

I acknowledge that I am a work in progress, and accept that my intention does not excuse and is not relevant to any of my potentially hurtful behavior. I will inevitably spend years trying to reverse a lifetime of micro aggressions, white savior complex, and utter ignorance.

For this month of Unacceptable Behavior, I’m inviting BIPOC friends to take the reigns and help me navigate this fragile and critical conversation as an ignorant, racist white woman.

If you feel so inclined, please reach out to me in the DMs and let me know if you have resources, stories, or feel inclined to have a conversation with me (on or off the podcast) about your experiences.

I am here to listen, to learn, and to publically expose my own wrongdoing to normalize the incredible amount of unlearning white folks have to do.

BIPOC sex educator shoutouts for this episode: @evyan.whitney, @samanthasoloud, @mxcmorgan, @miss_cherlyn

BIPOC mid roll advertisement: @Funds4Caregivers

BIPOC reading rec: Killing the Black Body by Dorothy Roberts (@DorothyRoberts appears to be their insta but I cannot officially confirm this)

Feb 02, 202129:24

What I Didn't Learn in Sex Ed

Today's episode is me babbling on for an hour about all the things I wish I had learned in sex ed... Because, basically, what you'll hear is that my sex ed experience is as body-negative, shame driven, and un-inclusive as yours probably was. Coming from my personal experiences, I explore a lot in this episode. My mom, my generational curses, my journey of unlearning, and my struggle with accepting all parts of who I really am.

Jan 26, 202156:49

Polyandry, Cannabis, Sex Ed & My Liberation Story

I cannot even begin to describe how difficult it was for me to make this, knowing that this part of my life is going public. For so long I've been a private person, but I now know that a crucial piece to my liberation is my willingness and ability to express my lifestyle with words.

I'm a student of the Institute of Sexuality Education and Enlightenment, @HolisticSexEd. If Sexual Attitude Reassessment taught me anything, it's that my words empower and embody my inner truth. It's time to express that to the people I love. Welcome to The Unacceptable Behavior Podcast.

This podcast might not be for everyone. I will be speaking candidly about sex, polyandry, cannabis, and liberation. If these things aren't for you, I don't fault you for that! These conversations are not for everyone hearts.

But if you think my journey of living out loud speaks to YOUR heart, I urge you to follow along in my journey. I am at the very, very beginning, and I want nothing more than to create a space where it is safe to speak my inner truth, and for you to be able to speak yours. In this space, Black Lives Matter. In this space, trans rights are human rights. In this space, the LGBTQA+ has an unforgettably powerful voice. In this space, pleasure is your basic human right.

I'm excited, and terrified to start this journey. Let's go.

Jan 19, 202122:36